Blog update 6.12.11
Today I met a man named Jason, a man I will never forget. Jason was put into an adult jail at 13 for a 20 year sentence. Before that he came from a broken family and a sexually abusive home. Needless to say he was robbed of his youth, and interestingly he just got out on Thursday.
Jason has a hard shell accompanied by big scars on both of his arms and neck from his own attempts to take his life. He also has lots of other scars that look like stab wounds or worse. And then there are the tattoos of vile things and the piercings on his ears and face. But the one thing that betrays his tough guy look is the sweetness in his smile. Whenever I looked into his eyes as he told me a story about one thing or another I couldn’t help but see a child, a young boy trying to survive and break out of the weather worn exterior of a man who had felt a lot of pain (And please know that I didn’t write this like this to try and be cute, this is true!) Today Jason is a genuinely kind man. He was polite and helpful, quick to ask about someone else’s comfort or well being before his own.
Since getting out Thursday, John, who works for the underground, has been helping Jason out (they know each other previously). Jason had never been to a movie theater so John took him to the movies, and tonight Jason wanted to go fishing so we went fishing. John explained that he really just wanted to meet the needs that he could for a friend and unknown to John Jason explained to me multiple times during the night how John was like a brother to him and that people like john who don’t judge based on the outside of a person give him hope. When I asked Jason about the next step in his life now that he is out he told me that he is working hard to meet people and build positive relationships in his life. He continued to tell me that for the future he explained that he wants to speak to youth and share his story maybe even write a book about it.
While we were fishing, waded into the water up to our chests, I watched as Jason relaxed and came into his own as he stepped into the water. Freed in the ocean, he swam and escaped into the waves. He reminded me and even looked like a little kid in the water, and I could tell that he was experiencing abundant life and the innocence of his youth that was robbed of him. Later on, in sequence, John told me how he used to drop Jason off at a pier on a Friday with a tent a sleeping bag and a fishing pole and not hear from him until the next Tuesday. It was only five minutes later that Jason told me the same story. He explained that people thought he was crazy but he loved it! Something in my heart was joyful to see a man like Jason liberated from pain and bad memories and in innocence finding joy and home in the water. At the end of the night Jason asked us if we had a good day and when we told him it was great he got a big grin on his face and said that he had a really good day too! He thanked us and told us that it was nice meeting us...
There was something beautiful about today. Something so special about what I got to witness in Jason and the just realness of a broken man who should be bitter instead take joy in the smallest of things. I was humbled, and honored to have met him. Even as I type this I want to cry for the way that life was robbed of Jason. I don’t even know what the crime was that he pleaded guilty to doing to get his 20 years and avoid a conviction and a life sentence, but as he explained that while he made mistakes he wasn’t guilty of the crime, and that the “victim” even wrote him a letter now that he is out saying she would testify to that truth so he could have the crime removed from his record, I believed him. He explained also that the lawyer on his case quit his job when he found out the sentence and the injustice of how everything happened, and that he just wishes he could have his youth back but since he can’t he doesn’t worry about it too much. One thing that was really interesting for me was that Jason was very willing to share his story but he requested one thing first. He asked me not to judge him by the outside...
I want to be a person who doesn’t judge the shell of a human, but their heart instead; a person who can give hope to the hopeless like Jason, or at the very least a chance at real relationship and community. Jason knows Jesus and it seems like he is being disciple as he learns to love him as well. Though he is tough having learned to survive in prison as a young boy, there is a childlike streak in him that reflects the renewed heart and abundance of life he has even on the road to recovery just two days out of prison... Whenever you think of it, pray for Jason, and pray for the youth who hopefully will hear his story!
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